Hogwart's Express to the Loch Ness... (see what I did there?) 7/11/13

Up early and pack the car - say goodbye to the castle.  Breakfast is a cold continental this morning, not the hot buffet that it was yesterday.  They’ll take our orders and give us hot food, but we don’t have time for that.  Just some cereal and fruit and we head out by 7:15.   We wake Tim up and he’s ready to take us to Fort William.  We’re really looking forward to today – we get to ride on the Hogwart’s Express – at least the trains that were used for it, and we get to ride across the viaduct (the iconic bridge) that the train goes across in the movies.  I always just thought it was a CGI train.  The train leaves at 10, and we’re about 2.5 hours away.  Then it’s a 2 hour train ride to a little town called Maillag on the west coast of Scotland. We get about 2 hours there to shop and eat, and then we head back.  We’ll arrive back in Fort William about 4:00, and then drive up to Inverness for the night. 



Bye bye reading nook

Bye, bye castle view...

Bye, bye toast holder that looks like a mail sorter (we have a version of this at every breakfast)

We’ve started a new thing with Patti – okay, you know that it’s just me doing it - so I can't really call it a new thing.. but it's spreading..  But while we were in Glasgow at the pizza place, Patti turned to me and stuck her tongue out, and breathed out… like a failed attempt at a raspberry.. she says that just her "full breathing"... Well, she did it in my general direction, and I really thought she was trying to say something with it.. So now it's a thing..I turn to her and do it to her on occasion, just to make her laugh.. It reminds me of the "thhhh" mouth morpheme a little.  It’s a great way to greet someone in the mornings.  Try it…. See what they say.

Tim says we have a 9:53 arrival time for the train.  We're supposed to be there at 9:55, so.. Plenty of time.  The roads are really winding, but we're starting to get a taste of the Highlands.  They call them "high" lands for a reason.  I'm having to down shift to make it up some of the hills.  What might you think the speed limit around these narrow blind hills with rock surfaces millimeters from your car would be?  20?  30?  Nope - 60mph. Seriously?! We're going 30 and it still seems like that is fast – I get up to 32 at one point and it feels like, “whoa dude, what’s the hurry!?”. Dana says its like a roller coaster back there... It's not much better up front.  And I’m sure Brittany would trade. J

There are wide loads on these narrow roads too.  Lots of cars pulling camping trailers, and lots of coach busses.  We get caught behind them, but they're even worse coming at you.  But that's not really true - we all actually share the road pretty well, only the occasional road hog.  At one point we get a pretty decent straightaway and the bus in front of us slows, turns on his left blinker and pulls over a bit, as much as he can toward the shoulder (the signal that we can pass). I pass, and we have plenty of space and a clear view - but down the road a bit, there is a car coming toward us. Patti screams!! I tense - scared me!  But the car coming at us had slowed, pulled over a bit to let me know he was giving way.... It was all good.  Patti just freaked.  I assured her I was in alert mode - just not panic mode.  She said that she's gotten better since we started; she missed a lot of the English countryside because she had her eyes closed.

We see a sign that reminds people that "parking in the zig-zag is selfish and dangerous"... Patti think they're talking about the zebra crossing (cross walks where pedestrians have the right of way) – but they mean the crazy tight zig zag turns! I can't imagine!   We've seen people just parking in driving lanes in towns (there are no shoulders to pull off and park on, so you just make a space in the road).  But to do that with these blind zig-zag corners??  Yikes. Selfish and Dangerous.  We do chuckle a bit at how the British approach those signs though. They’re so polite and try to use the British manners against them.  You would be selfish if you did that; shame, shame.  In America that sign might translate to “NO parking in the zig-zag at all times”.  We just order and shout our road signs – such brutes.

Then it happens right in front of us - the car in front of us slows to a stop, puts on his hazard lights and we have to wait to pull around him.  As we look back he pulls over more - but that's just weird.

We get to the train and find parking - careful not to park at the grocery store (per the instructions on the train's website) and we're right on time despite going 30 in a 60 for half the trip – not sure how.  We all could use a bathroom, but I'm a little paranoid about missing the train, so the others agree to wait and use the bathrooms on the train.   We find our seats and we're in second class seats.. The first class were full when we booked, they're the cars that have compartments like the Hogwart's Express.  But we do have a nice area of 4 seats with a table.  The train does have a bathroom, and we probably could have made the other bathrooms (they were pay to pee toilets)… you can only use the bathroom on the train while the train is moving (anyone know why?) - and we have about 15 minutes to departure (they wanted us there 20 min early).

We chill on the train and look over the pamphlets about Maillag that are on our tables.  We get about 2 hours there. It's billed as a cute little town on the west coast - lots of shopping and seafood.   I head back
to the gift shop car and get a little tin of fudge with the train going over the viaduct (with the famous pic of the Hogwart's train going over the bridge) –  Dana gets a souvenir map for just 1 pound and we study it. We had a chance to buy one before as the guy that looks like the love child of Clay Aikan and George (or Fred) Weasley came through to sell them – but they looked like little kid animated maps.. so we passed.  But for a pound, it’s nice to know where we are on the route, and it looks like the viaduct comes up pretty
quickly so we have to watch for it.

We hear (kind of) an announcement, but can't understand what they're saying.  I keep alert for the viaduct because I'm guessing they may be telling us that it’s coming up and to keep arms and legs inside (at least that's what I would say).  And then I see it in the distance. I make a bee line for a door – the exit to the train car - (it has an open window and a clear view) and get great video of us going across.  I was gone before the others even realized it.  Dana said that she turned to tell me that it was coming up and I wasn’t there.

They make a stop along the way and Patti and I get off, mainly just to get some air (heat wave – it is freaking hot on that train), and we get dorky pics of us waving from the train and we explore carriage D, the ones with the Harry Potter compartments.   They're clearly someone else's seats - so we hurry. But it doesn't keep us from going in.  There is a nice mood on the platform, a guy in full Scottish dress is playing the bagpipes, cute little small town, and there is a guy pushing the train museum (one room) for only 50 cents.  We opt not to go through the museum in favor of air. 

This is what dorks look like

First class car

It's private -- shhhhhhh

This is where the toast thing comes into play... Patti is being TOAST

We get back on the train and are treated to more beautiful scenes.  As we go along, some read, some nap...some blog...  There are a lot of tunnels on this leg of the trip, and the smell of the train smoke in the tunnels is really not pleasant.  The windows are open for what little ventilation we can get, and there isn’t much evidence that air is even passing through the train, until we hit a tunnel and come out the other side looking like a bug bomb went off in the train. I guess no one is worried about carbon monoxide poisoning.

There are quite a few kids on the train.  Not sure what their interest is in Harry Potter. ;) The family across from us is French with kids about 6/7 - playing games with Harry Potter playing cards to pass the time.  They don't like to have their window open and as I’ve said it’s pretty miserable in the train car.  We chose to blame them.  If only they would open their small window then the cross ventilation effect of the train would be complete and we’d all be nice and cool. We're hoping to have someone else across from us on the way back.

Maillag is small – like SMALL -- like maybe 3-4 blocks small.  You can see the whole town at about the same time.  We hit the gift shops that we had keyed in on in the guide on the way up, and there are some cute things, but so many things that are completely unrelated to the area, like just random gift shop surplus or something.  One is like a surf shop, another has board games.. As we go through the UK we see many places where we think they could use a little marketing help. This town is the final destination of a VERY popular train ride (we had to get them early so they weren’t sold out, and we still didn’t get the 1^st class cabins).  The town needs to take full advantage of that – get the town a paint job, play up to the cute little town gift shop expectations..  Just not really what we expected from the brochure.

Random games

We pick a place to eat because we only have about 90 minutes left before we board again.  We all get the fish and chips, I also get a "slice" of haggis - and we ask for water – we always ask for water, we are so used to drinking a lot more water than we’re getting on this trip.  The jug isn't even enough to fill all four glasses once and we’re not getting the best service, so there is no promise of water to come anytime soon.  And just as we're saying that, another girl brings us another jug (with two more glasses).  We all realize at some point that the water is probably for another table...and we laugh later because we all admit that we knew, and we didn't care.  We wanted their water. Our water now.  It’s a dog eat dog world.

The fish is good - and the haggis is less fru-fru for sure.  I read that it's traditional to serve it with "tatties" (mashed potatoes). And my fru-fru haggis had that to cut the gamey taste.  Today, no tatties, and much gameyness.   Patti tries some and it's not really for her.  I like it, but I'm glad I have my fish and chips for back up, and I don’t eat the whole thing – very rich today.   Brittany had considered getting the prawn baked potato, but its described as a baked potato with just prawns on top and then "dip" on that.  We're guessing cocktail sauce - but who knows, and the waitress can't really describe it, so she goes with the fish and chips.  Dana spots a baked potato that she wants (not!) - baked beans on a baked potato.  She makes this face that we've seen before but are always amused by - her "disgusted" face makes her eyes bulge, her neck pop, and her mouth look like Wallace (from Wallace and Grommet)... She must really hate the idea of baked beans on a potato. It’s a really severe reaction to some beans on a potato.  She says she doesn't even know she's doing it, and later we can't get her to replicate it so we can get a pic and show it to her.  And post it on Facebook (I didn’t really do that)… But I’ll post it here as soon as I get one. 

We head to the bookstore across the street and I find some flower books for my grandmother.  Britt finds a nice scarf in the "Ginger" woolen arts store, Dana finally buys something and we seek out bathrooms and head back to the train.

 

 

 

There is a seagull hanging around, he's a pushy little guy and he's hungry – someone is feeding him by throwing food at him and he’s catching it in midair..    Britt gets a pic of him staring at her through the train window – it’s like he was stalking us.  I try to find something to throw to him and I find candies in my purse - I thought it was taffy, Dana thinks its toffee, and it’s actually caramel (after I take a bite of it).  Don't worry I didn't feed it to the gull.  I ate it.  And one had chocolate in the middle.  I pretend to be disgusted (it was quite good) and try to make the Dana face... And then pester Dana until I get her on video trying to recreate it. Not the same as the original reaction.

Random kilt man

Gimmee my FOOD!

There's a man in a kilt walking the platform, and both Britt and Dana snap pics if him for me.  I've said that I want a man in a kilt.  And he'd better be a "true Scotsman".

When we got off when we arrived, we got some pics of the engine of the train, but you can't get any pics from the front of the train because they had it blocked with cones (maybe steam comes up and causes a liability).  I figured that we could get a pic of the front on the way back because it will be facing the other way... But no. The platform ends before the train does and we still can't see the front of the train.  The front is the part that looks like the Hogwart's Express is what people want a picture with, and it’s completely inaccessible at departure and arrival.. It’s the reason we're on the train..I’m betting the reason that most of these people are on this train, and no one can get a picture of it or with it.  We'll try again when we get off in Fort William – but this is another one of those marketing things.  Heck, charge people a pound if they want a picture with it – they’d pay it. 

We load up... And we're sitting right across from the French family again.  So far their window is open.  Fingers crossed that ventilation happens.

Dana goes to get is diet cokes and reports back that she successfully counted out 60p for her purchase.  I tell them that I've figured out the money and try to teach them my method.  The coins go in pairs and within that pair have a similar look and are relative in size to each other.
- 1p and 2p both are copper circular coins.. And the 2 is bigger than the 1.
- 5p and 10p are both silver circular coins.  With the 10 larger than the 5.
- 20p and 50p are both hexagon shaped silver coins and the 50 is larger than the 20.
- even the 1 pound and 2 pound coins follow this.
You're welcome.

This is your brain on Pounds.. Two pounds/1 pound (top left), Below that: 50 pence and 20 pence (hexagons), then upper right: 2 pence and 1 pence; and lower right, 10 pence and 5 pence

I try to make a game out of who can make the proper change the fastest.  But they're not into it.  I think it could be a big hit.  Introduce people to foreign currency and laugh as they struggle to pay in exact change – add a time element and you’ve got your next big show.  Dana wants her money for the soda she bought for me.  And I shuffle around coins while she tries to pick it out within the allotted time… and in our spare time we try to re-create Dana's "yuck" face.  It's a good thing she's such a good sport, we'd all be dead by now.

New profile pic?

Not it...

It's hot.  Still.  Dana found an available window (the exit door window) to stick her head out of to get pics of us crossing the viaduct. She got some great shots, and she stays there for most of the trip.  It’s hard to leave that breeze once you find it.  As we pull into the station again at Fort William there is another train getting ready to head out and the engine is facing us, so we’re able to get some pics so we do have the front!

Back on the road!  Just a couple of hours to get to Inverness, and the drive takes us along side of the Loch Ness.  It’s a big lake!  We’re fairly certain that we saw Nessy – but we couldn’t get the camera on in time.  Damn.  But trust us. 

 

Inverness seems like a cute town – we’re staying at a B&B here, and we don’t really have any plans except to explore the village, and then check out a view of the lake, maybe see MacBeth’s castle, and then head down south.   We check in and then re-park (across the street so we can “see our car” – we’re not sure why we need to see it, are we in the bad part of the village?).  She apologizes for the heat... we’re way north in the highlands… its probably about 65 at the most.  We're all in one room, one double bed and two twins – and it’s nice to see each other instead of having to split up.  Our host misunderstands us when I say “oh, we’re all in one room” and thinks that I’m upset by it – she’s sure that we booked it that way… yep, it’s all good, we’re just staying in so many places that I don’t remember what we booked sometimes.  But at this point we’re so worn out that we don’t do much except stare at each other and our screens by the time we get in.  The room is warm (this heat can be apologized for) and the window just opens a tiny crack so even with the cool weather outside there is no air in the room.  And they don't have fans...who needs a fan in a place where you’re apologizing for the heat at 65 degrees?

Our host recommends a place for dinner that serves two courses for 13 pounds, it's a foodie place, but we’re in Scotland and I want haggis.  So I ask for a place that does that, but she doesn't like haggis so asking her to give us the "best" haggis place is an oxymoron.  We give her our breakfast orders for the morning and head out on the town.

We set out across the foot bridge and just walk around looking at closed shops and menus.  We find a place in the guide that promises a modern twist on Scottish traditions.  And that sounds fun, but we go
for a place that had more traditional spin on the traditional.   They have haggis (and a cute sign out front that says it’s caught local).  It's so good. This is the standard by which all other haggis will be compared. The nips and tatties make all the difference – and the whiskey sauce -- mmmmm.   Dana doesn't want “weird food” and almost every dish has something Scottish in it like black pudding or haggis but she finds a grilled chicken something - Pork something for Britt that looked really good and Patti gets some amazing lamb kabobs... Our waiter is Alan Cumming.  Scottish, gay and just an essence if Alan.  We try to get pictures. I ask him if people ever tell him that he looks like Alan, and he blushes a bit – yes, his friends tell him that… 

 

There is an American couple that sits at the table next to us and they’re a little odd – they get champagne and toast to Loch Ness.   Brittany is watching them like tv. 

We find some open shops around the corner and hit them all -- and by the end they all look pretty similar. We find tartan clan stuff but again more McKay stuff than MacBeth.  Still the only thing that we find are the tartan scarves.  C'mon we're in MacBeth country now.  One of his castles is ACROSS THE STREET – can we get some MacBeth love?  Cowder Castle is just 10 miles from here...And still it’s all about the damn MacKay clan.  I have a feeling that the MacBeths and the MacKays had issues back in the day and it’s coming back to visit us.  Can’t believe I can’t find some MacBeth love anywhere in Scotland.  Shakin’ my head.   Brittany find some cute pins… and there are no MacKay pins – well, they make them, but they’re sold out.  But there are MacBeth pins (HA!!).  She asks the cashier and they have another store across the river – they call and they have the pins in MacKay, so they hold them for her.  Very short-lived “ha!”…  she's about done with McKay stuff.. She was told to buy as much McKay stuff as possible and I think that she's done a great job.  Can’t tell you the number of things that she has with McKay (MacKay) on it, including cute little bottles of whiskey. 

We walk back to the B&B and Dana is declared the master of the British windows - she figures out how to open it wide and we have a fabulous breeze and a very nice sleep!

Daily totals:  12,855 steps;  52 stairs;  5.32 miles